Comment and Cement

« There is no amount of intellectual dissection which would ever convince me that I’m not standing on the sidewalk. »

Paging Timmy Leary. Perhaps you need to meet Ayahuasca or her friend LSD. They have a reputation of convincing.

 Lol. You’re leaning too heavy on the “convince me“. No matter what kind of psychedelic journey I might be on, no matter what hallucinations I might be involved with, for sure if I step off a cliff I’m going to fall to the ground and be hurt very badly. It doesn’t matter what language I use. And it doesn’t matter whether I’m hallucinating or not.

— My late brother was schizophrenic, and he not only swore that Jesus his brother, alive and well, but that he was at times sitting beside him. If you took him at his word, Jesus was the favoured son, and no one recognised him for who he (my brother) was.

 yeah I have taken my fair decade of psychedelics.:). In my mid-20s I surely was not invested in our modern civilized ideal by any means, except to say that LSD was manufactured by modern scientists. Lol.

In 1993 I met this guy who was 16 years old in 1964. I met him in Boulder Colorado. He was one of the “ Psychward“ people who just wander the streets and drink coffee and smoke cigarettes. He was a little odd. And I got to know them because, well, I didn’t live by civilized conventions back then. And one day, I had known him for maybe three Years from just talking with him on the street now and then. And I went over to his house one day to drink some beers and smoke some weed, and we got to talking.

 Like I said, he was 16 in 1964, and he hung out with people that were older than him then. He was at a party one night and he remembers that there was this jug, like a clay jug a small clay jug, and he wondered what it was because people kept picking it up and setting it back down whatever. And he asked one of his friends wet that jug was. And His Freind. said “this is the first LSD on this side of the Rocky Mountains“. And my friend said that his friend poured him in a bucket glass, you know those kinds of glasses that you would drink scotch from maybe, poured him about 2 inches of this stuff from the jug. And he said here have some. And my friend drank the whole thing.

 My friend said that it was 1984 when he woke up, basically. During those 30 years he could not do anything at all for himself. He had to have a personal assistant at all times. To wipe his ass to change his clothes to tie his shoes to feed him. Etc. Everything. And my friend saidDuring this time he was traveling to all sorts of planets, other dimensions, talking to creatures from those places. And he said he vaguely remember during that time that all sorts of people would try to talk with him. Like psychiatrists, his nurse, his family. And he would try to speak back to them, but all that would come out was just garble and nonsense and he could tell from the responses he was going to from those people that he was not making any sense. And he remembers those vague fleeting moments as very frustrating.

 So, in 1984 was a significant moment for him because his nurse was giving him lunch or some thing. And his nurse asked him some thing and he replied to her and he knew that she understood what he said. And so from that moment he was conscious again, or in reality again, but he was still kind of go in and out still had to have an assistant.

 So I met him in 1993. And he had only recently been able to have his own apartment and spend his own money and feed himself etc.

 I was talking to him that day while we were smoking some weed. And he seemed relatively normal though he was a little weird around the edges. And as I talk to him he started telling me that he was actually Jesus Christ and that he was supposed to come and save the world but he was born a day too late. (He was Jewish actually). So now what he is doing is he’s saving money trying to get his head together a little bit because he needed To get back to Israel and talk to the head rabbi is there to let them know that he actually did arrive.

 👽

 And I had another friend who was actually my friend friend and we did a lot of drugs together. But he did way more acid than I ever did. And I remember he wanted me to come over one day and so I went over. And he’s all excited. And he said that he had tripped last night and that he had, that aliens had arrived and told him that he had reached the next level of consciousness. And that he had some sort of mission to do but they weren’t going to tell him quite yet because he had to get used to his new consciousness first.

 And he told me that the aliens took him and took him out to the ocean’s all over the world where he spoke with whales and dolphins. And that actually Dolphins are more involved than human beings. And he knows this because he spoke dolphin to some of the dolphins who confirmed to him with the aliens that this was true.

 Another friend of mine, a little less schizophrenic and more just trippy. He related to me how he sat in a chair listening to some music while his eyeball popped out of its socket and slowly started to crawl down his face to his shoulder to his neck crawled all the way down to the floor while he is looking through that eyeball, and then the eyeball turned back and looked at him sitting in the chair, The viscera and the optic nerve extended and still attached all the way up to his gaping eyesocket.

 Yes. lol. ..

—- Off his meds, he held dialogues with Jesus, God, and any number of other figments. They were 100% real ‘to him’, but there was no concurrence.

—- Idiomatically, facts and truths operate are synonyms, but for an academic conversation I feel it’s important to distinguish between the two. It may be a fact (or not) that you are standing on a sidewalk, but there is no truth content to the statement.

 my point is, that I used to think the same way. That your reality is different than my reality, that we construct our own realities with meaning, perception is all individual, etc. phenomena list philosophies. But I have found that despite what great meaning I might want to gain from my experiences, despite what I may attest and assert is the truth of my reality, ultimately, those taken to the end, if one really investigates Without stopping anywhere along the line to say “this is the truth“, what one finds inevitably is that one is just filled with shit. That it’s just a fantasy. (See Zizek) That ultimately human beings can make up whatever truth they want about things.

 But then the irony of the whole situation is that you have to go through that whole complete cycle before one realizes the actual truth of the situation is that there is an actual ground of reality that we all understand and despite what words and fantasies of imagination we would want to apply to them.

 So, philosophy and the writers mimic this whole journey, they reverberate it, they talk about it etc. That’s what Philosophy. is calling it is the investigation of experience. Yes, even if we were to say it’s an investigation into “whatever types” of things, ultimately the only thing we’re dealing with is a bunch of human beings thinking they know so much.

 The real issue (reality) is how does one discern The actual truth, from me or subjective reality.

 At least, that’s what my work is about. Because, like I said if I was to hit you in the head with a baseball bat, I’m sure it wouldn’t matter what you thought it was what meaning you made of it, what words you used to describe it. Blood, yes blood, and any language in any concept, would pour out of your head and you would get a hemorrhage if not a concussion, again despite what words we would use and despite what fantasies of why it occurred or what was really happening. The fact, the truth of the matter is I took a baseball bat and slammed you in the head and now your head is swelling and you fell to the ground. There’s nothing about that situation that would not be true except in as much as someone would continue to assert some other fantasy of reality or whatever.

Speaking of terrain-mapping reality, I’ve always been intrigued by quarks, who don’t comply with our ordinary sense of reality. Quarks have a quality termed ‘spin’. In our usual world, things have a spin of 1. If you are facing me and spin around 360°, you are again facing me. Some quarks exhibit this behaviour. Others, have a spin of a half or one and a half; respectively, the first spins 180° to re-show it’s face and the second 540. Imagine if that happened ‘in reality’, beyond the level of quanta. Imagine if this was not just some idiomatic anecdote.

 well, I tend to believe that reality in general, indeed the universe, functions inherently without separation. And this is to say that what appears as separation occurs only in orientations upon discourse.







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